What to do when there is nothing to do...

If you've kept up with any of my blogs before, you know that I am a pretty big advocate of authenticity in my writing so here you go - a post about reality. 

A few months ago I made a promise to myself that when I feel stressed, anxious, or not doing okay, I will not numb but rather I will breathe into the discomfort that I am currently feeling and just be there in the feeling.

I don't know how fun that sounds to you but it is one of the hardest thing I have to do. I am a big fan of positive emotions and the idea of settling into a negative emotion without trying to make it go away is not fun for me.

This week has been usually hard - work stress, personal stress, brain stress, life stress, 20 something stress.

Now I have methods of stress coping but have been pretty dang ungrateful because none of my stress management protocols were doing a very effective job of making me feel better. 

Have you ever had days, weeks, months like that? 

Where you've tried everything you know - the tea, the yoga, the breathing, the self help, the communication and nothing is working?

What to do when there's nothing to do?

I have been coming back to that phrase in my mind all week because I am a fixer, a problem solver by nature and by profession. However the reality is that some times there is nothing to do. Some times there is no quick fix. There are no easy answers. There are no books to read about it.

Some times the only thing you can do when there is nothing to do is put one foot in front of the other and keep moving along in the journey of life.

That was the answer that kept coming to me and it felt pretty cliche so I kept trying to dig deeper, to research more, to find an answer, to create peace. More new age chill music playlist. More prayers. More throwing myself into work projects. More hours of sleep at night.

What to do when there's nothing to do?

Today I got a reminder that made me absolutely certain that the best thing to do when there is nothing to do is to keep moving. In the middle of my workday I got a reminder that tomorrow will be a year since the second life threating motor vehicle accident I have been in. It stopped me in my tracks. The entire scene replaying before my head.  I was inches away from crashing into a gas tank and potentially setting my car and myself on fire. It should have been worse. It could have been worse. My life was spared by God. 

So maybe in the middle of my quarter life crisis week, I may not get an answer, I may not get stress relief in the way I am craving - but the only thing I can do when there is nothing to do is keep moving. I can keep living with the conviction that my life has some value. That Someone out there is looking out for me. That I am not completely alone. That everything will all come together in a beautiful way someday soon.

What to do when there's nothing to do?

Keep breathing

Keep moving

Keep walking